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The Tiger Woods Wedding
Original music by John W. Bratton - Original lyrics by Jimmy Kennedy

[If you would like musical accompaniment, please click here]

If you go down to the Woods' today,
You're sure of a big surprise.
If you go down to the Woods' today,
You'd better believe your eyes.
For all the Woods and Nordegrens there,
Are joining in the fun of the fair.
Today's the day that Tiger and Elin get married.

If you go down to the Woods' today,
You'd better mind where you tread.
The paparazzi are out today,
But if they get caught they're dead.
'Cos Stevie's keeping the press at bay,
And if he sees a snapper he'll slay.
Today's the day that Tiger and Elin get married.

[Musical refrain - repeats]

And even if he's not number one,
He'll have a good day today.
He's finally wedding his Swedish blonde,
To hell with bloody Vijay.
Beneath the trees, where nobody sees,
They'll kiss and cuddle among the leaves.
Today's the day that Tiger and Elin get married.

Wedding bells for Tiger Woods,
The little Swedes and Thais and US have all come out to play.
See them in the neighbourhood,
But snap and Steve'll take your camera away.
See them gaily dance about,
Listen to Tiger shout
"Fore right", he's slicing the food!
At six o'clock their mummies and daddies
Will join them for a photo shoot,
'Cos "Hello" paid millions for the goods.

If you go down to the Woods' today...
If you go down to the Woods' today...

Wedding bells for Tiger Woods,
The little Swedes and Thais and US have all come out to play.
See them in the neighbourhood,
But snap and Steve'll take your camera away.
See them gaily dance about,
Listen to Tiger shout
"Fore right", he's slicing the food!
At six o'clock their mummies and daddies
Will join them for a photo shoot,
'Cos "Hello" paid millions for the goods.

 


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