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Dutch courage "leads" The Masters |
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April 14, 2003; Source: AnyoneForTee worldwide exclusive Martha cohort "led Masters" after rained off first day  AUGUSTA. A feminist protestor from Holland is claiming a moral victory for the women's movement by secretly completing 18 holes on the first day of the Masters when the event was officially rained off - the first time in 64 years.Until the tournament was over, the news had been stifled by the Augusta authorities in case of further disruption, and none of the mainstream press were prepared to cover the story in case they had their course badges revoked. But AnyoneForTee has gained exclusive access to the intrepid player, who says she should be recognised as the day one tournament leader. Under cover of pouring rain and near darkness, Anne de Winneriz, a 15 handicap player from the Netherlands, splashed her way round for a creditable 103 (31 over par). "I would have broken 100 but for a partridge (8 over par under AnyoneForTee's new scoring system, see here for details) on the par 3 16th when I mistook the water for just another bit of fairway," a soaked de Winneriz told us over a hot cocoa. "The way I was going I might even have made the cut."  The news and subsequent exposure - although de Winneriz is feeling much better now - is a major coup for the player's sponsor Gobra, which has been supporting women's golf for 20 years. De Winneriz (pictured third from the left on this photo, sitting on a dyke in the Netherlands) said that none of the male players had managed to start, let alone finish a round, "all because of a little rain. What kind of golfers are they? We play in worse than this in Holland for half the year.""This proves Augusta should accept women players," she added. "What's next? Final day called off because of sunburn fears?" As exclusively revealed earlier this week on AnyoneForTee, the appalling weather prevented a US$5 million winner takes all golfing showdown to settle the bitter dispute over women's membership at Augusta between club chairman Hootie Johnson and women's rights campaigner Martha Burk. Instead, AnyoneForTee has teamed up with the US Department of Commerce's National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) to prepare a special super-computer simulated version of the Martha v Hootie clash. Ironically, the immensely powerful computer normally produces weather forecasts.  All relevant particulars about the two’s playing ability (Hootie plays off 13, Martha off a specially created 72 as she has only played once, badly, in her life), temperament and even their sartorial shortcomings (significant because of their effect on the empathy of the gallery) will be fed into the super-computer and hole-by-hole coverage, with commentary by Peter Alliss, will be available, free of charge, to viewers of AnyoneForTee.Read the earlier stories from this year's Masters by clicking on the links below: |
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