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Belly good news for chip-yippers! | |
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May 31, 2004; Source: AnyoneForTee First belly chipper released by Gobra as Anyone For Tee campaign to beat the chipping y..yi...yip...yips takes off! By our Behavioural Correspondent Chip Back | |
UK. The first ever belly chipper is being launched later this year by Gobra, following Anyone For Tee’s pioneering campaign to find a cure for the ailment that afflicts millions of sporting lives around the world – the chipping yips. The specially extended club nestles neatly into the player’s belly or navel, lending extra control over the shot and virtually eliminating the stuttering, jabbing, doffing, whiffing and topping movements known and feared by all chipping yippers. (A full list of medically recognised chip-yipping ailments can be found by clicking here.)Because of the unusual length of the club, first time users sometimes experience slight discomfort and are prone to catch the ball rather fat, which can cause a fluff. Navel fluff, as this condition is known, is unsightly but easily remedied, and with a little perseverance former chip-yippers will soon be stroking it with the best of them. For the really really chronic yip...yip...yipper [the condition also affects golf writers and ty..typ...typists - Ed.] an ultra-extension is available where the top of the handle rests inside the right n..no...nost...nostril, with an alternative nostril version available for lefties.  The innovation is being partly funded by the recently-founded anti-chip-yip foundation ITTTTTTCYA - It’s Time to Take Those Terrible Trembling Chipping Yips Awaayyyyyyyyyyy! An expert team, led by renowned Harley Street sports psychologist Professor Honour Couch (pictured left with senior team member Dr Ivor Twitch, reviewing potential medication for extreme cases), is working tirelessly to bring relief to millions of golfers worldwide, and gaining international recognition.The yips are a psycho-neuromuscular problem that often occurs in golf, especially during chipping or putting, when the golfer experiences freezing, jerking, or a tremor prior to attempting a stroke. ITTTTTTCYA’s work has attracted the interest of some of the biggest names in sports and medicine. Anyone For Tee is donating 50% of its advertising revenues [believed to be between $5 and $20 on an annualized basis - Ed.] to the foundation. And fast-growing golf equipment supplier Gobra (www.gobra.co.uk) is supplying expertise and hardware free of charge to the project, as well as contributing a percentage of all sales of its revolutionary new golfing underpants to help keep yippers’ balls in play.  One of the first professionals to try out the new belly chipper in the heat of competition is none other than world no. 2 Vijay Singh (left). Vijay has been an adept of the belly putter for years, and believes that the Gobra belly chipper may be just the edge he needs to supplant arch-rival Tiger Woods at the top of the world rankings.But the new belly chipper has attracted its share of critics. Veteran US golfing superstar Craig 'the Walrus' Stadler told Anyone For Tee: "I’ve had thousands of chips in my belly over the years – I don’t see what all the fuss is about."  And South African superstar Ernie Els was particularly dismissive of the initiative.Els, who recently called for the banning of belly putters, said: "Frankly I cannot stomach belly putters. Nerves are a part of the game. If you put the end of the club against your body then it is resting against something and you can make the perfect stroke with your hands. What next, belly drivers? Or maybe a bigger hole?" But golfing manufacturers are not so disdainful. Callaway is thinking of launching its own Yipper’s range of clubs with a special titanium grip that locks into an iron tube strapped onto the golfer’s chest to stop any sudden or jerking movement. The Ca..Call...Calla...Callaway Big Bellytha, as the prototype is known, has proven astoundingly successful during secret tests in Taiwan with fomer Asian golfing legend and sufferer Yip Wun Mor. Anyone For Tee says: Els' criticism shows how out of touch with the common golfer today’s superstars have become. Yipping is a terrible wasting disease (often wasting as many as 18 shots a round) and its victims deserve support and sympathy – not sarcasm. And... a message from the publisher: Want to help ITTTTTTCYA cure the chipping yips? Want to see Anyone For Tee’s publisher feel able to state his name in public again? Send your solution to the chipping yips to thechipsaredown@anyonefortee.com and we’ll publish the best remedies to a growing global audience. | |
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